Trapped in the Closet
by LaClem
Summary: Short 1-shot. Songfic to R. Kelly's 'Trapped in the Closet - first 5 chapters only'. Only NaruHina style. Rated M for cursing and slight lime.


A/N: Don't ask, I have no clue what made me do this. I was listening to it on my iPod and it just wouldn't leave me alone. So, thought I'd get it out of my system. Oh, and any flames will be used for my amusement.

Disclaimer: I don't own the song, or Naruto.

Trapped in the Closet - NaruHina style!

(((00)))

It was seven o'clock in the morning, when the rays from the sun woke him. Naruto stretched and yawned in a bed that didn't belong to him. Slightly alarmed, he looked around to see his clothes thown across the bedroom floor. In a bedroom that wasn't his.

"Good morning, darling." came a voice from the bathroom. He half expected to see his wife Hinata. But it wasn't her voice calling out to him.

And it wasn't her beautiful face that stepped out and kissed him softly. She wasn't Hinata.

Naruto looked at her with a dumb look on his face, thinking of what he'd done. How could he be so stupid to have laid there in that bed until the sun came up? He lost track of time, what the hell was he thinking? He went from the club to this girls home, he didn't plan to be staying that long.

He quickly tried to put on his clothes, searching for his car keys. He tried to go out the door.

But she stepped in front of it and said, "You can't go this way."

Naruto looked at her like she was crazy, "Woman, move out of my way, I got a wife at home."

She looked backwards at the door, "Please, don't go out there."

"Lady, I've got to get home."

"My husband is coming up the stairs."

Naruto felt his jaw drop, as his heartbeat accelerated.

"Ssh, ssh, quiet, hurry up and get in the closet. Don't make a sound."

"Why don't I just go out the window?"

She shook her long blonde hair, he could've sworn it was a different color last night, "Yes, except we're on the fifth floor."

"Shit think, shit! Quick! Get me in the closet." he whispered roughly.

So now there he was in a dark closet, trying to figure out just how he was going to get his stupid ass out of this house. He heard a man open the door and yell out that he was home.

"Honey, I'm in the room." she called out to her husband.

Shikamaru came in the room with a smile on his face, "I've missed you."

Sakura hopped all over him, giving him her full attention. "I've cooked dinner and drew your bath water." she was giving an Oscar performance.

The man threw his wife on the bed and started taking her clothes off, while Naruto was trying to figure what the fuck was going on.

But then he couldn't believe it. A call came through on his phone. He did his best to put it on vibrate, but it was too late. He could tell by the way the man was acting.

"There's a mystery going on in here and I'm going solve it."

Naruto prayed to himself, "God please don't let this man open this closet."

He walks into the bathroom and looks behind the door.

"Baby, come back to bed," Sakura said a little nervously.

"Bitch, say no more." Shikamaru said as he pulled the shower curtain back, as she was biting on her manicured nails.

He walked back into the room, while Naruto was sweating like hell.

Shikamaru checked under the bed, the dresser and looked at the closet.

Naruto pulled out his pistol.

He walked up to the closet.

Staring at the closet.

Damn he's opening the closet…

(((00)))

Well… Now Shikamaru looks at Naruto like he's looking in the mirror. Both wore the same expressions. Looking at each other for a second.

"Honey please let me explain…"

"You don't have to go no further, I can clearly see what's going on. Behind my back, in my bed, and in my home."

Naruto stepped in, "Wait a minute, now hold on. Mister we can work this out."

"Honey don't lose control." Sakura pleaded to her husband to calm down.

"I should've known that you would go and do some bugus shit like this in my house. But the christian in me wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt."

"We need to resolve this," Naruto said.

Shikamaru stepped up to Naruto, and he backed up, "There's a reason I was in that closet."

"Yeah like what? Talking to the clothes?" he retorted.

"I met this girl at the Leaf Club, and she told me she didn't have a man."

Shikamaru scoffed, "I'd kill you if you didn't have that gun in your hand."

"Look, your chick chose me." Naruto taunted.

"Please, don't give me that mack shit." he said as his cell went off and things were about to get a little more interesting.

Shikamaru stepped closer to Naruto, and Naruto said, "I'm not the one your after."

"I bet you didn't know man, I'm a pastor of the Nara clan."

"That's better right? We can handle this christian like." Naruto said, starting to put his gun down.

He quickly raised it again though, seeing the frown marred on Shikamaru's face. Sakura started crying and pleading, saying she was sorry. "Not as sorry as your gonna be." Shikamaru threatened.

While they were talking, Naruto tried to inch his way out of the house. He had to leave, this was turning crazy and he was panicking like no tomorrow. He was this close to just shooting them both and get the fuck out of there. What the hell was this man up to? What did he mean?

"No. I want you to see this." said Shikamaru.

"I gotta get out of this house."

"Not until I reveal my secret."

Naruto looked at him, trying to figure what was going on in this man's mind. Shikamaru took out his cell phone and told them to turn their car around. He looked at Naruto after he hung up and said, "Since we're all coming out of the closet, I'm not about to be the only one left broken-hearted."

"What do you mean?" Sakura's voice sounded shaky.

"Just wait and see."

"Somebody better talk to me." Naruto said dangerously, as the mans phone rang again."I'll buzz you up. I'm on the fifth floor, hurry take the stairs."

"Who is this mystery lady that you're talking to?" Naruto asked, with the thought that it had better not be his wife walking through that door.

"In time you'll found out the shocking truth. Baby, this is something I've been wanting to get off my chest for a long, long time."

"I'm about to shoot you both if you don't say what's on your mind!" Naruto warned.

"Wait, someone's coming up the stairs."

"I'm going to count to four!"

"1!"

"Mister wait." he said.

"2!"

"Please don't shoot." Sakura begged.

"3!"

"Don't shoot me." he looked him in the eyes.

"4!" Sakura screamed.

A knock came to the door, gun still in Naruto's hands.

To his surprise. And Sakura's.

The mystery woman was…

A man.

(((00)))

There they were, the four of them. In total shock was Naruto and Sakura.

Naruto closed his mouth and swallowed his saliva thinking that this was some deep shit, "So your going to tell me he's the one you've been talking to?"

"Yes."

"No." Naruto refused to believe this man was gay.

"Yes."

"No."

"It's the truth."

"All of your asses are crazy, let me out of here. This is way more than I bargained for." Naruto declared.

Sakura placed a hand on his arm, "Wait, I'm sure we can all fix this.""I'm late, and I don't have a damn thing to do with this."

"Wouldn't you like to know just how it all began?"

Naruto thought for a second, "Three minutes."

It grew really quiet.

"Somebody better start talking." Naruto demanded.

"My God Shikamaru, I just have one question. How could you do something like this? I'm so hurt!" Sakura cried.

"Bitch please, you have some nerve. With you always going to the club or lying saying that you're going shopping. And now here you are in our home saying that I've done wrong."

"Okay, so you busted me and that much I agree. You caught me cheating, but this is a little extreme!"

"You are my wife, sleeping with men behind my back. And now I come home and you have this man in the closet, how extreme is that?"

"But she's a he!"

"Please, you can't judge me."

"Shikamaru, this is crazy!"

"STOP ARGUING!" Naruto yelled. "I did not stay here to hear you chew each other out, so get to the point!"

"My name is Chouji, I think I can explain. I've known Shikamaru for a while. It's been a living hell sneaking around midnight in hotels…"

"Brother, spare me the details."

"Chouji please," said Shikamaru, "Don't say anything else."

"SHIKAMARU you son of a bitch!"

"Ino go to hell!"

"I thought you said your name Sakura? That's what you said at the party. Man this is getting bad, I'm going to end up shooting somebody."

Shikamaru started yelling and screaming, "Ino this is all your fault!"

"You were cheating too! Only difference was you didn't get caught!"

Chouji screamed, "We're in love!"

"Love my ass!" Ino tossed back.

"We're getting married" Shikamaru said quietly.

Naruto shot out a warning shot into the ceiling, not being able to handle this pressure from the constant arguing. "Not another word, all of this shit is unheard of."

Naruto grabbed his cell and dialed his home.

Thinking this whole situation was wrong.

But on the other line, a man picks up his phone.

(((00)))

Now Naruto was dashing home, doing 85, swerving from lane to lane, with fire in his eyes. Millions of thoughts running through his mind. Wondering what he was going to do, and to who, once he got home. How could he have been so blind?

Then he checked his rearview mirror and could not believe what he saw. Damn, here comes the police.

He pulled over after the cop drove up on his bumper flashing his lights. The cop got out and walked over to Naruto. "I'm Officer Sasuke Uchiha, license and registration please."

"Officer, is there something wrong?"

"No, except you were doing 60 in a 45 mile zone."

"Officer Uchiha, let me explain please. You see the truth of the matter is that I have an emergency.

"No excuses. No exceptions." he flicked his cigarette and handed the ticket to Naruto. "Have a nice day."

"Yeah right." Naruto said sarcastically and drove away, turning on his radio doing 55 all the way home.

He pulled up the driveway, hopped out and slammed the car door shut. Went around the back door, busted in making Hinata scream, "What's all that for!?"

"Hinata, I called this house and another man picked up my phone."

She breathed and placed her hands on his shoulders, "Naruto, calm down. Did you forget? My cousin Neji came over today."

"Oh." Naruto was shocked, and ashamed for accusing his beautiful and faithful wife of cheating. Of doing the exact thing he'd just done. He was sick. "I forgot he was coming to visit today."

She gave one of her shy smiles, "That's okay, because I understand. You don't have to explain."

Naruto took her by the hand, grateful for his loving wife. He led her up to their bedroom, turned on the music. Apologized again and started kissing her, touching her, appreciating her with his body. She was biting her lip, grabbing him and moaning.

They were making love as she whispered, "It's all yours."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Naruto let a tear fall out of his eye with their sweet love-making, "You're my sunshine, Hinata."

She stared at him, "Baby go deeper please."

That's when he started going really crazy, faster, deeper, plunging into with everything he had. He lost all abandoned, didn't even care if he would be giving her a baby at the end of this. They were turning and turning, swirling, making their toes curl in the pleasure. She was scratching his back, calling out his name.

He was losing his breath fast, with a hangover, and coming the night before, he whispered, "Baby, I need to slow down."

"No, please don't stop!"

"I have a cramp in my leg!"

"Please keep on going!" she held on tighter, "I'm about to come!"

"Good, baby, come for me." he told her, looking into her pleasure filled face.

"You're the perfect lover." she whispered.

He laughed, "Sorry, but I can't go any further."

He pulled back the cover.

Only to find.

A rubber.

(((00)))

"Well, well, well. What the fuck is this? A condom in my bed, you better start talking bitch. Before I take a match and burn this whole fucking house down."

"Baby…I'm so speechless."

"My baby, you're gonna be breathless if you don't start talking real quick. I'm going to have a fit you have no idea what you're fucking with right now. So stop you're bullshit. It's obvious somebody has been in my home and in my bed. Plus I smell cigarettes."

Now Naruto was looking around his bedroom, making sure to check that damn closet first. He was trying to sniff out the source of the cigarette smoke. It was subtle, but all over HIS ROOM! He stared in Hinata's eyes and saw all of her fear. He pulled out his gun for the second time that morning, "Is he still here?"

She shook her head, indicating that he was gone. It didn't matter, he was checking each door, under the bed, everywhere.

She was crying by now, "He left after you called…"

"What the fuck were you thinking!? You thought that I wouldn't find out!? You have to be crazy to have somebody in my fucking house!"

She sat up, clenched her fists and looked him straight in the eye, "That's enough. I can't take no more, you made your point but its time to even the score."

He looked at her like had gone crazy, this was so unlike Hinata. It was expected for him to go a little out of control, but not her. Not his Hinata.

"That's right, I know about last night. And I know where you went when you left. That's right Naruto, I was there with this guy in the back of the Leaf Club."

Naruto shook his head, "I thought you were with your friends."

"I thought you were with yours." she countered, her eyes finally looking down. "You were at that sluts house, don't act surprised!"

"Baby…"

"Shut up. Don't say a word…there's nothing you can say that I haven't already heard."

"Now don't go and try to turn it all around. Fact remains that you had someone else in my house."

She looked up at him again, with tears in her eyes, "You're right about that, something did go down here. But I don't have to turn it around, what goes around comes back around."

Naruto moved a little closer to her, she stepped away from him, tripping over the furniture.

She raised her hands, "Wait, let me explain…"

He roughly shook his head, "No need, just give me his name."

"Uh..Uh…"

"Uh what?!"

"P-please sit down in the chair."

He shook his head again, "No, I'll stand."

"I'm so scared to tell you Naruto, because of what you might do!"

"Look Hinata! You better give me this man's name and I'm not playing with you anymore!"

She cried silently, "Okay," she wipes her eyes, "You know Tenten?"

"Sounds familiar, anyway what the hell does that have to do with this man?"

"She said he knew my friend Temari…""Who the hell is Temari!?"

"Temari is a friend of mine, who knows this guy name Chouji. And Chouji's friends with this guy named Shikamaru…"

"What the fuck…" Naruto whispered, mouth going down, eyes widening a little again.

"And Shikamaru's wife Ino, w-we both went to the same academy…"

"And…"

"She introduced me to…the policeman that stopped you."

THE END

A/N: Told you it was short. Poorly written, I'm looking for a beta. I'm into a lot of things and am pretty picky. I NEED someone who will tell me how it is regardless of my feelings. I have so many works in the makings it's not funny. Any recommendations?


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